Plastic Jesus

I don't care if it

Rains or freezes

As long as I've got my

Plastic Jesus

Ridin' on the dashboard

Of my car

Through my trials

And tribulations

And my travels

Through the nation

With my plastic Jesus

I'll go far

Ridin' down the thoroughfare

With a nose up in the air

A wreck may be ahead

But he don't mind

Trouble comin'

He don't see

He just keeps his eye on me

And any other thing that lies behind

With my plastic Jesus

Goodbye and I'll go far

I said with my plastic Jesus

Sitting on the dashboard of my car

When I'm in a traffic jam

He don't care if I say damn

I can let all my curses roll

'Cos Jesus' plastic doesn't hear

'Cos he has a plastic ear

The man who invented plastic

Saved my soul

With my plastic Jesus

Goodbye and I'll go far

I said with my plastic Jesus

Sitting on the dashboard of my car

An if I weave around at night

Policemen think I'm very tight

They never find my bottle

Though they ask

'Cos plastic Jesus shelters me

For his head comes off you see

He's hollow and I use him like a flask

Woa Woa Woa

Save me

I don't care if it's dark or scary

Long as I got magnetic Mary

Ridin' on the dashboard of my car

I feel that I'm protected amply

I've got the love of the whole damn family

Ridin' on the dashboard of my car

With my plastic Jesus

I said goodbye

And I'll go far

And I said with my plastic Jesus

I said sittin' on the dashboard of my car

When I'm goin' fornicatin'

I've got my ceramic Satan

Sittin' on the dashboard of my car

Women know I'm on the level

Thanks to the wide-eyed stoneware devil

Sneerin' from the dashboard of my car