A Message From The King

(announcer)

And now, here with a special Christmas message,

The immortal...Elvis

(synth plays "Silent Night" in background, Elvis

speaks...)

Well thank you, thank ya vurry much..

This here is 'The King'. I know I haven't been around

much for awhile, but I want y'all to know, that up here

in rock 'n' roll heaven, I'll be thinkin' of ya this

Christmas. And I'd like to give y'all a special

Christmas message- A message of peace....like, uh, how

bout a little piece of that pie goin' by? Thank you.

Thank ya vurry much.

(Silverware and plates begin clattering. It becomes

obvious that Elvis is sitting at a big banquet table in

heaven)

But like I was sayin', Christmas is a time o' hope, a

time of joy, a time for lovin'. And I sure would

love...a big slice of that pizza ya got there (chomp,

slurp) Thank you. Thank ya vurry much. Now where was I?

Oh yeah, Christmas. Now, Christmas to me means family.

And family means friends. And friends means gettin'

together. And gettin' together means...eatin'! Ah, pass

me that drumstick, would you please, Ah, thank you,

thank ya vurry much. (chomp, munch, burp)

Now I just want to say to ya right now, ya know, I may

be a big star- maybe too big. But ain't nobody so big

that he can't reach out a helpin' hand...a

helpin'...hand. Uh, would ya hand me a helpin' of those

mashed potaters over there? Would ya please? Thank you.

Thank ya vurry much. (slurp, munch) Now like I was

sayin', ain't nobody so big he can't stoop to help a

friend in need over the holiday season... And speakin'

of seasonin', ya wanna pass me that salt shaker when ya

get the chance? Yeah, just unscrew the cover, that's

right, thank ya, thank ya vurry much.

So this Christmas, why don't ya take a tip from ol'

Elvis....

No, no, leave those steak tips right where they are,

know what I mean? Yeah, I 'preciate it, thank ya. I

want ya to remember that we're all part o' God's great

big family. And you know God made man unto his own

image. And lookin' in the mirror, I'd have to say God

must be a big, big son of a gun. Y'know what I mean? I

think you do.

But I specially want you to remember this one last

thing.

When yer'all at home this Christmas, stringin' that

popcorn up on the tree, save a big, big bowl for The

King. Extra butter, y'know what I mean? I think you do.

Thank you. Thank ya vurry much. (slurp, chomp, slurp)