Red Lights

In all good faith and sentiment

I can't believe somehow

That I haven't died of grief or something

Since you left this town

I'm all undecorated, cigarettes

And standard white apartment walls

At 3 AM and 4 AM

It's impossible to sleep

I'd do anything to hold you

And feel you next to me

But I'm all sore eyes and beasts

At my back door, pulling out their claws

So yes I will take those

Whatever else they give me

If it stops the nightmares

It probably won’t kill me

And if I slow it down I’ll end up on one of my accusers' knives

So I only stop to tell her that I love her at the red lights

And all in all, I'm wrecked you see

From years of piping down

And piping up about the things

That never mattered anyhow

When you change too much you lose yourself

And sometimes you just can't get them back

And you might be an angel or devil I don’t know

But if in fact you are now love

Well I’ve been there before

I’ve fallen on my face

And I’ve been burned so near to death I probably won’t live through it

Anyhow

So yes I will take those

Whatever else they give me

If it stops the nightmares

It probably won’t kill me

And if I slow it down I’ll end up on one of my accusers' knives

So I only stop to tell her that I love her at the red lights