Bill's Laundromat Bar And Grill

Well I was three days short

Of pulling out of King's Port

I was headed down to Houston town

I had my guitar packed in a burlap sack

For exploitin' my country sound

I bypassed Jackson, bypassed Memphis

By the time I got to Arkansas

I'd a sold my car and that black guitar

For anything cool and tall

So I pulled up to a neon sign

On Highway 49

I shut the engine down

Took a look around

Then I stepped inside

I asked that bouncer where I was

He said "Son, you're at Bill's"

"Honky Tonk Pickin', Line Dance Kickin'"

"Razorback Stickin', Barbecue Chicken"

"Laundromat Bar and Grill"

Well I found old Bill sitting at the bar

With a pistol and change machine

He was doling out quarters to a waitress named Star

When I asked him if I could sing

He said "Son, go ahead, if you brought your guitar"

Then he pointed to the backstage door

He said "We don't like original material"

"Unless it's been done before"

Well I hit the stage like a big mule train

Told the house band to play in C

Sang The Tennessee Waltz, Kentucky Rain

And the one about the bird that's free

The lead guitar was like a chain saw

That fiddle like a power drill

At Bill's Honky Tonk Pickin', Line Dance Kickin'

Razorback Stickin', Barbecue Chicken

Laundromat Bar and Grill

In the 10 short minutes I was up on stage

I watched a biker punch a cowboy's face

And with a perfect view, I was witness to

The destruction of the whole dang place

It was long-neck stems and white French hems

Flying out of that dark saloon

That mechanical bull was reduced in full

To the safest place in the room

And that punch-drunk cowboy showed his wife

That his shirt was soaked in beer

She said "Calm down honey, have another Light"

"'Cause we can wash the shirt right here"

Then the whole placed to stop to thank me

For making my show at Bill's

Honky Tonk Pickin', Line Dance Kickin'

Razorback Stickin', Barbecue Chicken

Laundromat Bar and Grill