Lyrics Drive-By Truckers

Drive-By Truckers

The President's Penis Is Missing

They looked in the White House and Capitol Hill

They looked everywhere for Buffalo Bill

We called every scholar, reporter, and genius

Has anyone seen the President's penis?

It ain't in the Congress or Judiciary

It ain't in the Smithsonian or that big ole library

an astronomer claims it was sighted on Venus

Has anyone seen the President's penis?

THE PRESIDENT'S PENIS IS MISSING OLE'!!!

WE SEARCHED HIGH AND LOW, EVERY NIGHT EVERYDAY

LORD, WON'T YOU COME DOWN AND REDEEM US

HAS ANYONE SEEN THE PRESIDENT'S PENIS?

Now Presidents have goofed up in all kinds of ways

in the 80's we elected one missing his brain

George Washington caught a cold he couldn't explain

and we all know the truth about Thomas Jefferson's name?

Franklin D. Roosevelt wasn't no square

with that raging Woodrow in his wheelchair

and all the lesbians snickered that Elenor didn't care

and John Kennedy's penis was seen everywhere?

THE PRESIDENT'S PENIS IS MISSING OLE'!!!

WE SEARCHED HIGH AND LOW EVERY NIGHT EVERY DAY

LORD WON'T YOU COME DOWN AND REDEEM US

HAS ANYONE SEEN THE PRESIDENT'S PENIS?"

Them outer space people would laugh if they'd seen us

all this talk about cum-stains and oral coitus

meanwhile the whole world suffers from hunger and meanness

but we're more concerned with the President's penis?