My Dad's Gone Crazy

Daddy what are you doing?

Okay then!

Everybody listen up!

I'm goin' to hell!

Who's comin' with me?

Somebody please help him!

I think my dad's gone crazy

There's no mountain I can't climb, there's no tower too high,

No plane that I can't learn how to fly

What do I gotta do to get through to you,

To show you there ain't nothin' I can't take this chainsaw to?

Fuckin' brains, brawn and brass balls, I cut'em off,

And got'em pickled and bronzed in a glass jar inside of a hall

With my framed autographed sunglasses with Elton John's name on my drag wall,

I'm out the closet, I've been lyin' my ass off

All this time me and Dre been fuckin' with hats off (Suck it, Marshall).

So tell Laura and her husband to back off

Before I push this motherfuckin' button and blast off

And launch one at these Russians and that's all

Blow every fuckin' thing except Afghanistan on the map off.

When will it stop? When will I knock the crap off?

Hailie, tell 'em baby,

My Dad's Lost It!

[Chorus]

There's really nothin' else to say, I, I can't explain it

I think my dad's gone crazy

A little help from Hailie Jade, won't you tell 'em baby

I think my dad's gone crazy

There's nothin' you could do or say that could ever change me

I think my dad's gone crazy

There's no one on earth that can save me, not even Hailie

I think my dad's gone crazy

It's like my mother always told me and codeine and

Goddammit you little motherfucker

If you ain't got nothin' nice to say then don't say nothin'

Uh, fuck that shit bitch eat a motherfuckin' dick,

Chew on a prick and lick

A million mutherfuckin' cocks per second,

I'd rather put out a mutherfuckin' Gospel record

I'd rather be a pussy whipped bitch, eat pussy,

And have pussy lips glued to my face

With a clit ring in my nose then quit bringin' my flows

Quit givin' me my ammo. Can't you see why I'm so mean?

If y'all leave me alone this wouldn't be my M.O.

I wouldn't have to go, eenee, meenee, meini, mo,

Catch a homo by his toe, man I don't know no more

Am I the only fuckin' one who's normal any more?

Dad

[Chorus]

My songs can make you cry, take you by surprise at the same time,

Can make you dry your eyes with the same rhyme

See what you're seein' is a genius at work, which to me isn't work,

So it's easy to misinterpret it at first

'Cause when I speak, it's tongue-in-cheek,

I'd yank my fuckin' teeth before I'd ever bite my tongue

I'd slice my gums, get struck by fuckin' lightning twice at once

And die and come back as Vanilla Ice's son

And walk around the rest of my life spit on,

And kicked and hit with shit every time

I sung like R. Kelly as soon as "Bump and Grind" comes on.

More pain inside of my brain than the eyes of a little girl

Inside of a plane aimed at the World Trade, standin' on Ronnie's grave,

Screamin' at the sky, 'til clouds gather, it's Clyde Mathers and Bonnie Jade

And that's pretty much the gist of it, the parents are pissed but the kids love it.

Nine millimeter heater stashed in two seaters with meat cleavers

I don't blame you, I wouldn't let Hailie listen to me neither

[Chorus]

Crazy

Ha ha ha

You're funny daddy!