You Had Too Much To Drink

Aiyyo whassup E man?

Yo coolin PMD

True true man, I just been lampin man

So what you been up to lately man?

Just been loungin man, knowhatI'msayin?

True true man, yo man, who's your boy over there man?

Oh that's my man from out of town

Oh word man? Yo whassup man? My name is P man

How you doin man? My name is Frankie Anto man

But my friends, they call me Frank B

Oh word man? Nice to meet you man

So yo man E, what you gettin into tonight man?

Yo P man I'm bout to flex downtown to this club

Word man? Yo man, that sounds cool man

I think I'm with that man - yo you wan' do that?

Let's do this man

Aight bet man

Yo, yo hold up wait a minute guys man

You guys mind if I go witchu to this club man?

Ahah aiyyo man E I don't know about that man

Last time we took somebody with us man

we had to carry him home man, he got out of control

The whole nine yars, yaknowhatI'msayin man?

Nah man, that's not me man, I can handle my liquor man

I just go to have a good time and DANCE man

Drinkin is no problem to me, stuff tastes like fruit punch

Are you sure man?

Positive man -- positively positive

Aight man, l-let's take him then

We went out that night

To a club downtown

That was very high class

And had boomin sounds

We went in

And we were dressed to impress

Fly women and girlies

Lookin their very best

We took a seat at the bar

Feelin brand new

Frank ordered drinks, no liquor

Just plain old brew

He finished it

Then he ordered one more

And another

And another

And that made four

He seen this fly girlie

Suave and deboinaire

Light skinned complexion

With long black hair

But this girl was ug-ly

I mean her body was through

But after four drinks or more

She looked like Paula Abdul

You know what baby? You startin to look good

You startin to look REAL good

You startin to remind me of that superstar - Paula Abdul

The party was over

It was time to go

You insisted on drivin

When we said no

Nah guys, y'know? I can drive myself home man

That ain't gonna be no problem

I drive better when I feel nice (P: Are you sure man?)

Are you kidding me man?

That stuff in there, that stuff in there taste like fruit punch

I could drink that all night

So you got in your car

Swervin on the road

There was a cop in the bushes

On radar patrol

The light turned green

And you decided to stop

It turned red

You took off

And got pulled over by a cop

You overdid it homes

You had too much to drink

Ah excuse me, can I see your license and registration please?

I don't have my license registration right NOW

But if you give me a chance, I can go home and get it

Oh what are you a wiseguy son?

No I don't mean to be a wiseguy officer

The honest truth, what really happened is

I just came from a plane from Dominican Republic

By the time I got to Motor Vehicle, Motor Vehicle was closed

Oh it was closed?

Yeah it was closed

Oh what's your name son?

My name is Frankie Nato, but my friends, they call me Frank B

How bout you officer - whatchu call yourself?

Oh this guy's a real wiseguy

Who's the young lady in the passenger seat?

You don't know who that is? That's a superstar

Paula Abdul, say hi Paula

Oh yeah that's Paula Abdul?

Have you been drinkin son?

Oh no I don't drink man, the only thing I drink is fruit punch

OK son you wanna turn your car off

and leave the keys in the ignition and come with me please?

Where we goin officer?

I want you to come sit in the backseat

and blow in this tube for me please

Wait a minute, I ain't no faggot

I never blow anything in my life, and don't plan to

How bout you officer - you blowin anything?

Just blow into the tube son

Okay okay man * blows into the tube *

Oh what's this man? Two point oh?

Oh Guns'n'Roses dude!

You might as well get ?

cause you goin downtown sonny, you're drunk!

So whatchu tryin to tell me officer?

You tryin to tell me that that machine, tell me I'm drunk man?

Somethin wrong with that machine

That machine need a good fixin man

That's what I think officer

No you know what I think son?

I think you need a good lawyer

Let me tell you officer, I have a lawyer

My lawyer is so good, SO SO good

And by the time he's finished witchu, you gonna be workin in Alaska

So dress warm, as a matter of fact

I suggest you go out and buy yourself a sheepdog

Cause it gets BITTERLY cold out there

Have you ever been coolin

On a Friday night

Wit your friends gettin wasted

Just feelin nice

You continued to drink

When you know you should stop

The next thing you know

You're behind is caught

Your body gets numb

So you slow up the pace

Your mouth gets watery

And you can't feel your face

You finally make it home

And the fun begins

You try to pass out

But here comes the spins

So you turn and toss

Then you toss and turn

Your head gets light

And your chest starts to burn

So you lay on your stomach

And you tuck in your chin

Pail by your bedside

Now the breathing begins

Oh, oh God, just let me get through this last one

If you let me make it

If you let me make it through the night God

I promise I'll never have another drink again

I'll never drink again, as long as I live

You overdid it

Hey yo this is EPMD tellin you not to drink and drive

Cause ain't nuttin cool about chillin in a coffin six feet under

YouknowwhatI'msayin?

Yo, this is Frank B

And learn from others mistakes homes!

And don't let peer pressure get to you

Cause it costs you, or your life, or somebody else's life

in the long run

And it's like that

And if you don't believe you can get the bozack

See-ya!

5000