Disfigured

Among Them

Pictures of god

And sin

And the pain

I’ve caused

Others and myself

Float through

My mind

Like crippled angels

Who can neither land

Nor find peace

Sadly,

I find myself among them

Disfigured

Somebody help me,

Somebody save me,

I want to drag

A blade across my face

I’m in conflict

With that Christ again,

Like some unholy

Martyr who’s dying for sin

I want to burn, yeah,

I want to bleed

You think I’m kidding man,

I’m real as real can be

I’ve been feeling

Those demons again,

Let my cross-eyed

Suicide of spirit begin

I feel tight, tight as a fist

And somehow blind

Like a mind full of ignorance

Turned away from the light

Pushed away from the light

Drawn away from the light

I wish Judas would kiss me,

And take me down,

Before I hurt the ones who love me now

I am disfigured, out of control

I am disfigured, let my face match my soul

Open your eyes Christ, don’t turn away

All I do, I do for you

That your pain not be in vain