Darque Tan

His life was a breeze

Just one thing left to appease

Wanna give that bottle a squeeze

and look just like Charlize?

But these times are so hard

Must do more than lay in the yard

To look like a Belize postcard

or a reality star

But this story's tragic

You don't turn orange by magic

You could do it solar like Rick

or stick your ass in a thick

tank full of darque waves 'cause it's the latest craze

Do it for forty days,

get accused of wearing blackface-oh!

DARQUE TAN, HE'S A FAN!

DARQUE TAN, NO MORE WAN!!

DARQUE TAN, IT'S HIS PLAN!!!

DARQUE TAN, CHILDREN RAN!!!!

I knew it was a bad idea when he got into that bed

I never knew it would come to this

'til he looked at me and said

I wanna get a tan! Uh-uh!!

I wanna get a tan!! Bad idea!!!

I wanna get a tan!!! I don't think so!!!!

I wanna get a tan!!!! TOO SCARY!!!!

And now he's dead,

I'll never see him again

He turned orange, then he turned red

No one wins in the end

Then he died,

his face was fried

In the booth all that's left is a tooth

He turned red,

then he turned dead

Listen and learn...or you, too, will be burned.