Gloria

Can't bear this strain any longer; I tell you "no," Gloria

Can't bear this strain any longer; I tell you "no," Gloria

You promised to marry me in the month of May

Now you try to run away; if it's the last thing I have to do

Gloria, my darling, I'm begging you

Please, marry me, Gloria, darling, can't you see, Gloria

With all your faults, I want you like a long dose of Epsom salts?

I'd like to be a bachelor

Before I met Gloria

I don't know what she did to me

Some people think I'm crazy

Some say it's the treatment, some say it's this and that

Some say she's a diplomat; I don't care what the case may be

Come, darling, let's join in matrimony

So please, marry me, Gloria, darling, can't you see, Gloria

My belly does boil, I want you like a bad dose of Castor oil?

You said you loved me but you lied

My friend saw you with another guy

And now you have me in a state

With all the doubts you create

Soon as I turned my back you were on the go

Gloria, girl, I tell you "no," and I beg you not to forget

A promise to me is more than a debt

So please, marry me, Gloria, sweetheart, can't you see, Gloria

You must understand I want you like a cop wants a wanted man?

Gloria is my only girl

My only hope in this world

Give me your hand and say you do

Come back to me, I'm telling you

I want you to have and hold until death we part

Please, don't try to break my heart

I say stop all this stupidness, darling, and seal it now with a kiss

Please, marry me, Gloria, darling, can't you see, Gloria

You lovely flower bud, I love you like a pig loves a pool of mud?