Buttermilk Boy

She pays no mind to methods you employ

She wants a big city man, not a country boy

Go get your long hair cut

Scrape the mud off your boots

Wash the hell behind those ears

Buy yourself some tailored suits

Buttermilk Boy better gain some pounds

Before she lets her knickers down

She wants a musclely man all gristle and bone

Makes no difference how you strive

She couldn't care if you're dead or alive

A burly, beefy, strong arm man

Is all she cares to meet

Before you ever heard the word guitar

Your mother used to see her as a star

Yes, she spent her teens

In chauffeured limousines

And I heard tell you can't get insured

For a clapped out '45 drop head Ford

Buttermilk Boy better gain some pounds

Before she lets her knickers down

She wants a musclely man all gristle and bone

She'll tear you down like a steer comin' through

Like I said she ain't no use to you

A lumpy hairy mundane brain

Is all she cares to make

So let me put you straight

Marry farm-yard Kate

She weights two hundred pounds it's said

But she'll keep you warm in bed

Buttermilk Boy better gain some pounds

Before she lets her knickers down

She wants a musclely man all gristle and bone

So you think you know where it's about

But she will suck you in and then she'll blow you out

Yes, Kate will keep you satisfied

Until your dying day

In chauffeured limousines