I Knew The Bride (When She Used To Be A Moll)

I knew the bride when she used to be a moll x 2

Well the bride looks a ripper in the outfit that her mother once wore

And it fuckin' nearly fit her, 'cept bride's about another foot tall

But that doesn't really matter, where it matters 'round the middle, it fits

'Cause like her mother when she wore it, when she married now the bride's up the stick

And I remember when I rooted her 'cause it was on our very first date

It was her and her girlfriend and me and about ooh 10 of me mates

They both knew what they were doin' 'cause they dragged us all down to the beach

So we give 'em a root, and a joint, and two dollars each

I can see her now steppin' out of her jeans

She was dishing out frangers like a vending machine

But someone musta copped a brumbie 'cause she's havin' a foal

I knew the bride when she used to be a moll x 2

Yeah

And the groom's not very happy, you can tell the poor prick wants to leave

And you can see he's upset by the silver trail of snot on his sleeve

And when she dragged him down the isle, me mates and me stood up and clapped

Sorta our way of sayin' "Mate, we appreciate ya coppin' the rap"

Now her mum's blind drunk and her old man's as full as a boot

You know that's the only time anybody's ever seen the old cunt in a suit

And it's a bit of a shame but I 'spose it's just the luck of the draw

The groom's new into town and he weren't even at the gang-bang at all

Now there's me and me mates up the back of the church

We been laughing so much that it's starting to hurt

And tonight I'd love to be a fuckin' fly on the wall, 'cause

I knew the bride when she used to be a moll x 2

(I knew the bride when she used to be a moll)

Shut up Greg, you'll get in trouble

(I knew the bride when she used to be a moll)

Now there's me mates and me pissed up the back of the church

We been laughing so much, it's fuckin' starting to hurt

And just for a joke, and a bit of a prank

We sent him some rope and a bloody great plank

So that when he climbs on, he don't fuckin' fall

I knew the bride when she used to be a moll x 2

(I screwed the bride when she used to be a moll) Repeat

So did I

So did Chris, Greg, Chook, Scab, Boogsie

Andy, Porky Taylor

North Badsman Yarra Dart's Club, ooh except for the C grade

They had a keg on 'round at Opie's place. Yeah

(Who fucked the bride)

Shut up Greg, you'll have us thrown out

(Who fucked the bride, heh heh)

Shut up Greg, for Christ's sake. Her old man's looking at us

Ha ha

text: Kevin Bloody Wilson

/ parodie písní: Nick Lowe - I Knew The Bride (When She Used To Rock and Roll) /