Rescue Mission

The captain touched his swagger stick

Up to his golden eye

And boogied through the vestibule

While bidding us goodbye

The enemy surrounds us

And our spirits almost gone

The Devil take the cavalry

That sold us for a song

There's Chi-Chi's on the starboard, lads

And Chi-Chi's in the stern

And hashish in the hookah pipes

And bonny grass to burn

Our mission is a secret

But we're fool enough to try

We'll sail the bloody ocean, boys

Or drink the bastard dry

"If I'd've been a carpenter," the swarthy

sergeant said

"I'd never seen this ugly thing

That hangs above my head

The hell with all your heros

And the wounds they hope to show

I'm just a simple soldier, son

With one more year to go"

The Albatross was tiring

And the cook was in a stew

The filthy little cabin boy

Was whizzing in my shoe

The Captain's wife was aging

And the first mate heard her scream

When Tommy slipped tabasco in the

Captain's vaseline

"Our time will soon be gone," he said

"It's all we've left to lose

We've shot our ammunition

And we're all but out of booze

So here's to Irma Donegal

Here's to Nellie Blye

And here's to my old friend," he said

And kissed his ass goodbye

"Give off! give off! You sorry lot.

Give off!," the Captain cried

"we've lost our bloody anchor

And we're driftin' with the tide

The swollen surf is pounding

Like a thousand cannons roar

And I shake the hand of any man

Who guides us into shore."

"We're saved! We're saved!"

The soldiers said

"We're saved!," the sailors cried

And soldiers climbed aboard

While sailors left from either side

Some swabbies hit the minefield and

The rifles got the rest

And somewhere there's a schooner

Sinkin' slowly in the west