Touch-Tone Telephone

I think it's time

For you to know

The awful truth

The truth about me, and the truth about you

Cause you're a brand new species

Big cat

Space Nazis

Robert Stack

God damn it, gonna snap

Leonard Nimoy,

Call me back (Call me back)

I try to call you every day

I'm rehearsing what to say

When the truth comes out (Of my very own mouth)

I've been working on a unified theory

If I make it through tonight, everybody's gonna hear me out

Cause I'm the right one

On my touch-tone, touch-tone telephone

I'm the only one

On your A.M., A.M. radio

Oh, I'm crying now

Authentic tears

They flow out of me when I think about you

Cause you're the only person in the world who'd understand

Cause you're the only person in the world who'd understand the meaning of this

Oh My God

I try, and I try, and I try to make you listen to me

I try to call you every day

I'm rehearsing what to say

When the truth comes out (Of my very own mouth)

I've been working on a unified theory

If I make it through tonight, everybody's gonna hear me out

Cause I'm the right one

On my touch-tone, touch-tone telephone

I'm the only one, hey!

On your A.M., A.M. radio

Don't hang up yet, I'm not done

I'm an expert, I'm the one

The one who was right all along

Better to be laughed at than wrong

I'm an expert in my field

UFOlogy, yes, it's all real

Ancient aliens, it's all true

I'm an expert just like you

And like you, I'm a genius before my time

Disbelieving, that's the real crime

Pretty soon they'll discover me in the Super-Sargasso Sea

I try to call you every day

What can I say

When the truth comes out? (Of my very own mouth)

I've been working on a unified theory

If I make it through tonight, everybody's gonna hear me out (Now, now, now)

Cause I'm the right one

On my touch-tone, touch-tone telephone

I'm the only one

On your A.M., A.M. radio