Table for One

I'm walking down in the basement

I'm leaning on the washing machine

I'm reaching back through a hole in the wall's insulation

I'm pulling out a bottle of vodka

Replacing that with a pint of Jim Bean

I'm lying down on the floor until I feel better

It's morning and I pour myself coffee

I drink it til the kitchen stops shaking

I'm backing out of the driveway

And into creation

And the loving spirit that follows me

Watching helplessly, will always forgive me

Oh, I want to die alone

With my sympathy beside me

I want to bring down all those demons who drank with me

Feasting bleed through me

On my desperation

I hide all the bottles in places

They find and confront me with pain in their eyes

And I promise that I'll make some changes

But reaching back it occurs to me

There will always be some kind of crisis for me

Oh, I want to die alone

With my sympathy beside me

I want to bring back all those moments they stole from me

In my reverie

Darkening days end

Oh, I want to die alone

With my memories inside me

I want to live that life

When I could say people had faith in me

I still see that guy in my memory

Oh, I want to die alone

With my sympathy beside me

I want to bring down all those people who drank with me

Watching happily

My humiliation