Katrina

I was the kind of kid back in school

Who wore a 'Members Only' jacket and said it was cool

That's when I met Katrina, she was best friends with Seshel

I thought she was the one, yeah, I thought that she was special

I saw her in the hall about a quarter to three

I said, ?I'll take you in my Nova to the Tasty Freeze?

She said, ?I know all about you, more than I should

I know all about your dirty mags you keep in the wood?

So tell me, how I'm supposed to be

When I've been stalked by a lesbian?

I can't sleep a wink

And I'm married to the ephedrine

How am I supposed to sleep

When I've been stalked by a lesbian now?

Stalked by a lesbian now

Now don't take it light, it might seem funny to you

Yesterday my science project was covered in glue

So I asked that guy Seshel, I said, ?Was it something I said??

He said, ?Quit being so fucking paranoid, it's all in your head?

The way she's looking at me, I think she wants me to be

The guy that always gets shot in every movie you see

Oh God, she's walking this way, oh God, what could I say?

And I hope and I pray that one day she's gonna be straight

So tell me, how I'm supposed to be

When I've been stalked by a lesbian?

I can't sleep a wink

And I'm married to the ephedrine

How am I supposed to sleep

When I've been stalked by a lesbian now?

Stalked by a lesbian now

Stalked by a lesbian now

So I was at a bar the other night and I looked across the room

And there's this girl and she walks up to me

She's beautiful and she says

?Hey, I'm Katrina, dude, remember me??

And I freaked, I said, ?Oh my God, I thought you looked familiar?

About this time, this 400 fucking pound woman walks up

With Katrina's face tattooed on the side of her neck

She comes waddling up and says, ?Don't fuck with my girl?

I looked at Jabba straight in the fucking eye and I say

?Don't worry, every time I picture Katrina's face

It's gonna be on the side of your gross, fat-assed, 3 chinned neck?

She says, ?Are you stupid??, I say, "No, I'm just sober?

So tell me, how I'm supposed to be

When I've been stalked by a lesbian?

I can't sleep a wink

And I'm married to the ephedrine

How am I supposed to sleep

When I've been stalked by a lesbian now?

Stalked by a lesbian now

Stalked by a lesbian now

I hope she beat the shit outta you, you homophobic