Horrify Through Self-destruction

and laughing at the chains im the first one

who voluntarily submits to her will

because this love blooms in humiliation

and in self-mutilation i cannot express

because her filthy womb demands a greater sacrifice

then a handful of silver coins

then a handful of everything

in effable pain i'm squeezing in my hands

my putrid brain though

there is not enough strength

to extract out of it just another poisonous drop

which may infect at least one additional life

with cracking white shell upon my face

each neuron crumbles and each cell withers

i do not know myself anymore

neither my own memories

i see only fingerprints, horror and ashes

i see cut face which fragments i collect

and 'cause i'm unable to cut with them a throat of mine (or the throats of best others)

again i'm throwing them aside

i scrape a mask from my face, a wreath of pink slices of dead meat

revealing all the bruises, scars and abscesses depicting a map of my anatomy

and i a dead of the world won't tell you anything beyond the ruin of my life

the ruin of my life!