Internet Relationships

Internet relationships are not real

Your heart people steal but identities conceal

So here's a tale of warning for girls and boys

Laptop computers can be dangerous toys

In the chat room, I inspect. Who's here tonight? ASL check

I'm 20/f from the UK. Send me an IM and I'll make your day

I'm 22 and my name is Daryl

Nice to meet you Daryl my name is Carol

What do you like Carol?

I like to go to shows. I collect comic books and vintage clothes

What do you like?

I like to skate. I play rock guitar, but I'm not that great

I like to go on dates and I like to stay up late

I live in San Francisco and hang on the Haight

Do you like the Golden Gate?

I did when I was eight

Maybe I can come and visit?

Maybe you should wait

See I'm really forty-seven, I have kids and a wife

I weight 300 pounds and I really hate my life

Are you serious?

Yes

Well, I've got a secret too. I'm not 20 years old, I'm really 32

I only have one leg and I like to sniff glue

You lied to me Carol

Well, you lied to me too

It's not normal to have an Internet girlfriend.

Online relationships are really just pretend

Unplug your heart, upgrade your system.

Get, get off the Internet

Bob went on MySpace for hours a day.

Talking to girls from Moscow to LA

But people can surprise you from behind a screen

Listen to this verse and you'll see what I mean

Hi, I'm Susie, I like your profile

I checked out your pics and I like your smile

Sounds good Susie, I'll be your friend

We can message each other again and again

Comment on my pics and post on my page

Join my groups and guess my age!

You must be 18, how could you not?

You can't be in high school you're just too hot

Let me send you pics for your personal collection

I hope they inspire you and give you a smile

Susie sent Bob pics that were borderline obscene

The cops showed up at his door - she was only 16

It's not normal to have an Internet girlfriend.

Online relationships are really just pretend

Unplug your heart, upgrade your system.

Get, get off the Internet

If you don't believe us here's a final story

About a boy named Marcus and his online girlfriend Lori

Behind the monitor, truth is hidden from your eyes

Marcus didn't know but he was in for a surprise

We've been dating for a while but let's cut to the chase

I don't know what you look like, and I want to see your face

But what does it matter? You know who I am inside

What if you're not a woman and this whole time you lied?

You got me there, I'm not really a female

I'm a guy who pretends to be a girl through email

So this is why it's bad to meet women online

Living life behind the screen is a total waste of time!

It's not normal to have an Internet girlfriend.

Online relationships are really just pretend

Unplug your heart, upgrade your system.

Get, get off the Internet

Internet Relationships (Are Not Real Relationships)