Shvensen Fitzlogik

Dropped my little sister off at San Jose State

Freshman hoties on the floor and they all look great

18 with brains and booties to match

I want to scratch that ass like Grandmaster Flash

You were in Gimboree my freshman year

Mr. T was on TV and now you're hear

Not creepy anymore when it feels like heaven

You know the hottest girls were born in 1987

1987 was the year, now they're freshman hotties

drinking cheap-ass beer

Fake ID's? They don't matter to me, you've got some tig

ol' bitties and some nice white teeth

Study with me, I won't open a book, I'm a SparkNote

tip, you might call me a crook

I take all the hot and attractive courses

I'm Shvensen Fitzlogik sing my chorus!

Shvensen Fitzlogik, wasted in college

25 year old in a freshman dorm (25 year old in a

freshman dorm)

Shvensen Fitzlogik, wasted in college

25 year old in a freshman dorm (25 year old in a

freshman dorm)

Hey mom, please send me more money, it's my eigth year

in college digging freshman honeys

Here try this, it will make you feel good, you can wake

up staring at the morning wood

Then I'll walk down the hall, holding on the wall,

Leave a little puke in the bathroom stall

On the girl's floor, I'll do it all again, it's a new

year I should ask you again

How old are you? Don't tell me yet

Wait let me guess, I'll make a bet

You've got a thing for older guys and I know it's true

Johnny Freshman can't do these things to you

These girls like good with their cute pink shorts

on the floor next to their book reports

You're no Margery Kempe, so shut your yap,

it's MC Lars and HardNox with the statutory rap

What's your name? My name's Shvensen

Try a little German baby, see what you're missin'

'Cause I'm so paid from my distray

In the freshman dorm party scene trying to get laid

Come in my upper room I've got some Coconut and Malibu

Sit on the couch - want a drink? I do!

Give me three, give me six, give me nine