Holiday Hate

It's that time of year for goin' SHOPPIN

It's that time of year for seein' GRANDMA

It's that time of year for lying to CHILDREN

That's right, Santa doesn't exist

It's that time of year for hatin' FRUITCAKE

It's that time of year for drinkin' EGG NOG

It's that time of year for bakin' a MINCE PIE

Betcha money by the end of the year you'll be FAT

Toys a plenty and choo-choo trains

Summer sausage and candy canes

Wal-mart santa coin donations

Salvation Army dedications

(Chorus)

Buy!

Consumers gotta

Buy!

Consumers gotta

Buy!

Consumers hit the malls, and drive the economy

Buy!

Consumers gotta

Buy!

Consumers gotta

Buy!

Consumers do your stuff, and make us all glad to be

home!

It's that time of year for hanging STOCKINGS

It's that time of year for GINGERBREAD MEN

It's that time of year for getting a FAKE TREE

Decorate or you're not gonna eat

It's that time of year for watching RE-RUNS

It's that time of year for roasting CHESTNUTS

It's that time of year for opening PRESENTS

Don't forget, better clean up the mess that YOU MADE

Christmas music overplayed

Every minute of every day

Find a present for your mother

Then your dad and then your brother!

(Chorus)

It's that time of year for cheesy SWEATERS

It's that time of years for fuzzy EARMUFFS

It's that time of year for footed PAJAMAS

You know the ones with the hole in the butt

It's that time of year for family DRAMA

It's that time of year for lots of DRUG USE

It's that time of year for having a BREAKDOWN

Holidays are the days that will make you hate life