Art School

It was clear to everybody in the family that as a

cripple I was a complete

Failure. I did no better at college, actually. I went

to the Hornsey College

Of Art. Hornsey, with the emphasis on horn.

But being at Art College in the mid till late sixties

was quite an experience.

Everything was changing in Britain: fashion, style,

art, theater.

But the thing I enjoyed most about Art College were the

chicks.

Exactly. Don't think of me as crumpet man, do you? Do

you?

But there was one chick in particular. She was in the

sculpture

Department. She was a complete goddess. She was like

one of these

Continental film stars. Her body was shaped like a

Gretch country

Gentleman guitar. But like a Gretch country gentleman,

she was too

Expensive for me.

But every night I persevered. I carried her easel up

the stairs to her bedsit.

All these stairs to this attic apartment. But once I

was inside her bedsit

I'd sit down and talk to her about politics, art,

literature, ...revolution!

The usual crap, do you know what I mean? And this girl

would lean

Against the refrigerator, sip her cocoa and stare at me

as if to say

"You can talk all the bullshit you want. You ain't

gonna get anywhere

With me". And she was right, so I like to dedicate this

next piece

To that wonderful prick-teaser of my youth.