Let It Blow

He was a species on the verge of extinction

She was an Air New Zealand hostess

They were mystically joined like Rawicz and Landauer

Like Pinky and Perky, like Porgy and Bess

Oh, he loved the pursuit and the romance

But the details were more of a chore

When the bride's veil lifted, his mind soon drifted

At least that's what happened before

Let it blow, let it snow

Let the mercury bubble and dive

Life's little traumas and courtroom dramas

Remind me I'm glad I'm alive

Oh, she loved the clinking of glasses

When the toast was to nobles and princes

In the conjugal nest she was seen at her best

With her keen eye for curtains and chintzes

And she had all of the furniture ordered

By the time they were naming the date

And her mother came speeding from distant Dunedin

To help with the flowers and cake

Let it blow, let it snow

Let the mercury bubble and dive

Life's little traumas and courtroom dramas

Remind me I'm glad I'm alive

At the Chapel of Partial Remembrance

The ushers went into a seizure

Mr. Bacchus, they said, "Should we stand on our heads

Would sackcloth and ashes displease you?"

And they honeymooned down in Ibiza

Where the sun and the nightlife were hot

As she lay on the sand, he said, "Isn't it grand?

I bring all of my wives to this spot"

Let it blow, let it snow

Let the mercury bubble and dive

Life's little traumas and courtroom dramas

Remind me I'm glad I'm alive

A life of volcanic activity

Left him nothing to spout but hot air

A long interruption since his last eruption

Was disguised by sheer devil may care

But some charm and some skill, and manoeuvre

Had him rising to meet the occasion

And for once they found bliss but news of their tryst

Got to Fleet Street and caused a sensation

Let it blow, let it snow

Let the mercury bubble and dive

Life's little traumas and courtroom dramas

Remind me I'm glad I'm alive

The Press was baying for blood now

They gave them a week at the most

We were all glad to see it reach weeks two and three

But the fourth week, the whole thing was toast

And she dragged her tail back to New Zealand

With threats of High Court and revenge

Meanwhile his eye did stray to the ample bustier

Of a novelty dancer from Penge

Let it blow, let it snow

Let the mercury bubble and dive

Life's little traumas and courtroom dramas

Remind me I'm glad I'm alive

Oh, let it blow, let it snow

Let the mercury bubble and dive

Life's little traumas and courtroom dramas

Remind me I'm glad I'm alive