Dick In The Dirt

I know this guy named Richard

He's my red-necked friend

He does everything the hard way

You see, Rich don't like to bend

He went out for a haircut

Get himself a little trim

Got hooked up with a beautician

And she set out to do him in

She knocked Dick in the dirt

He said that it didn't hurt one bit, no

She knocked Dick in the dirt

He jumped up and then she kissed him where it hurt

Now Rich knows girls in England

He's a well traveled man

He's been around the world, you see

He's met some hard demands

But, Jane, she knocked him right down

Well, he just get right back up, whew

Together they have this bond, you see

She likes to tie him up

She knocked Dick in the dirt

Yeah, he said that it didn't hurt one bit, no

She knocked Dick in the dirt

Yeah, but then she kissed him where it hurt, ow

Now, Rich, he got all junked up

Something rubbed him wrong

But, Jane, she straightens him out

Yeah, it never takes that long

'Cause Rich, he has no conscience

He's of a friendly persuasion

And any chance he has to meet someone new

He'll always rise to the occasion

She knocked Dick in the dirt

He said that it didn't hurt one bit, no

She knocked Dick in the dirt

He jumped up and then she kissed him where it hurt, ow

She knocked Dick in the dirt

He said, oh,it didn't hurt one bit, no

She knocked Dick in the dirt

He jumped up and then she kissed him where it hurt

Uh, ow