Disconnect

These things which I so often wonder

This need to create myself

Frustration forgotten through slumber

It's there when I wake, defeated before I rise

I'd pull myself out of this mire

If I could collect my strength

Or muster an ounce of desire

Finding the words, and making them mine

Is there somewhere

I could separate this feeling from memory

Disconnect myself from me?

Desire inside to mistreat you

It pushes words out of my mouth

This cyclical pattern I feed you

The back & forth, & up & down

But still here you are

Behind this veil of pious revelation

I'll close my eyes and look for worth inside

I don't deserve you

Relinquishing hope for the future

I try not to hate it so

But you are a bridge to those memories

I try to forget, if you only knew

Is there somewhere to occupy emotion

A room to keep my rage away from you?

Just tell me when these hopeless days are over

I'll open my eyes and see my new sun rise

I don't deserve this