Lyrics Stephen Lynch

Stephen Lynch

Crazy Peanuts

Charlie Brown had a big block head wore a stripy sweater everyday

Tried to kick that football but Lucy always pulled the mother fucker away

Flew a kite just to try to relax but he always put that shit in a tree

And a little red-headed girl wouldn’t give no play to poor Chuck B

They were the baddest fuckers in the funny papers PEANUTS!

Onto a security blanket, Linus VanPelt would latch

Snuggling to that bitch to keep warm while waiting in a pumpkin patch

Had a stalker named Sally Brown well she always tried to get her some

She loved how he knew the meaning of Christmas and the sexy way he sucked that thumb

Well watch out, cause here they come PEANUTS!

Oh Peanuts crazy Peanuts

A bunch of kids trying to be free

Take my hand and let’s dance know

Under Charlie’s shitty Christmas tree

ooh Marcy was best friends with Patty Patty Peppermint

She would love to do things to that girl that Charles M. Schulz can’t print

Pigpen was a dusty dude who couldn’t keep his own ass clean

All the teachers said “wa wa wa wa wa” what does that shit mean?

Well watch out, cause here they come PEANUTS!

Oh Peanuts crazy Peanuts

Coming from the school of hard knocks

Life’s not always bowls of candy

Sometimes you only get a bag of rocks

Lucy was a psychiatrist but her comments always gave offense

And the bitch couldn’t make no money cause she’d charge a mother fucker 5 cents

And all the ladies loved that Schroeder cause he’d play the 80’s hits real good

And Franklin was a real cool cat but the only brother in that hood

Well watch out, cause here they come PEANUTS!

Oh Peanuts crazy Peanuts

Poor Charlie Brown you will never get laid

It's so hard to get pussy

When you're the baldest kid in second grade

Oh Peanuts crazy Peanuts

A bunch of kids trying to be free

Take my hand and let’s dance now

Under Charlie’s shitty Christmas tree