Mario Man

The blim holes in my shell suit

Joined into an absolute

And fell apart one day

They stitched me up in Everton

Then they took me to a surgeon

Lost on penalties

Mario man

Mario man

Mario man

Mario man

I married at the altar

The village idiots daughter

Oh, lucky me

We honeymooned in Cyprus

That's where she caught the virus

I flew home alone

So I bought myself a chip pan

And I sailed it to the Isle of Man

For a holiday

Struggling in a vortex

With my jacket made of Gore-tex

It fits wonderfully

Mario man

Mario man

Mario man

Mario man

Zap, zap

Wham, wham

Says the Mario man today

(He's played so hard, he's got blisters on his fingers)

Mario man

Mario man

Mario man

Mario man