Hernia Belt

One day I sang an aria

that caused a hernia

it was a massive bulge

to the doctor I divulged

that I still had to play

though it caused me massive pain

I wont throw in the towel

just please hold in my bowels

I love my hernia belt

I love my hernia belt

it'll keep my guts inside me

til the end of the show

I've got a little friend down there (not that one)

a different little friend down there

a better one you can't find

to hold in your intestines

a high fashion wrap

that hits beneath the belt

I don't cause a fuss

in velcro I do trust

I love my hernia belt

I love my hernia belt

it'll keep my guts inside me until

I have my surgery

what are they gonna shave

what are they gonna save

when they fix my hernia

hope the doctor doesnt slip

when he cuts into my skin

I just want to piss in one direction!

now I love my hernia repair

I love my hernia repair

it'll kep my guts inside me for the rest of my life